Flashpoint Paradox
by Fictionstv
Summary: A parody of Flashpoint Paradox introducing Kara (Supergirl) in place of Superman. Barry Allen (Flash) wakes up to an apocalyptic scenario where the Amazonians and Atlantians are at war plunging the world into chaos. Flash must work with the remaining Justice League members to correct the timeline.
1. Chapter 1

It all started with a funeral. Barry Allen came to the gravesite of his mother, Nora, who had been brutally killed by robbers. He was a slender teenager with black hair in-and-out of foster homes. It was only recently that he acquired his great gift.

Bruce Wayne walked over to Barry wearing an expensive suit. Alfred stayed behind with the car. "If only I had been there," Barry said.

"Yeah, if only," Bruce agreed.

"If only I ran a little faster, I could have done something," Barry said frustrated.

"You could have maybe scared them off, called the cops, or created a distraction. Now, do you see the importance of training?" Bruce said.

"I'll train to be faster every day," Barry promised.

"That's the spirit," Bruce smiled. He then took out his phone indicating a break-in at the Gotham Museum of Art.

"We have a break-in at the museum. Time to go," Bruce said.

"Is this really a big deal? I wanted to go home and watch my cartoons," Barry complained.

"I gave this museum a lot of money. I'm not going to allow it to be destroyed," Bruce said seriously.

"Alright," Barry agreed. "Race you there," he said and ran off at super-human speed.

Bruce casually walked over to Alfred. "Did you tell that young man he was responsible for his mother's death, again?" Alfred asked.

"Yeah, so?" Bruce asked.

"He was only 5," Alfred pointed out.

"And?" Bruce questioned.

"Never mind, Sir.

Flash was already in uniform as he arrived at the museum. He ran around the museum entrance looking for the intruders. A few spinning tops then dropped near him. "Really?" Flash wondered as the spinning tops exploded.

The villain known as Top was on top of a large Greek statue. "Well, Flash, it looks like you're on the bottom and I'm on the top."

"That's what she said…wait…damn it," Flash realized his mistake.

Top threw out more spinning top grenades at Flash but this time Flash was ready for them. He spun around as quickly as a tornado sending the tops right back at Top. The Greek statue's head exploded and Top was nowhere to be seen.

A fire blast nearly hit Flash. "Mirror Master and Heat Wave," Flash presumed. He easily defeated both villains with his super speed. At the corner of his eye, he saw Top trying to escape.

"I have the lamest villains," Flash sighed.

Flash went after Top but was confronted by Captain Cold and Captain Boomerang. Captain Cold tried to freeze Flash in place while Captain Boomerang tried to keep Flash pinned to the wall. Cold managed to freeze Flash's leg slowing him down while Boomerang hit Flash with a strong adhesive. Flash struggled in vain against the sticky substance.

"So, what's this really about?" Flash asked making small talk.

"It's just a job. Nothing personal even though you did send us all to prison," Captain Cold said.

"Oh yeah, good times," Flash remembered fondly. "So, who hired you?"

"Like we're going to tell you," Mirror Master scoffed.

"They work for me," Zoom said as he entered the building.

"You just went ahead and made me look stupid just now," Mirror Master protested.

"There are bombs on each of you, now," Zoom replied.

"What the fuck?" Top said astounded. Each of them had a small bomb on their belts. They all worked furiously to take their belts off.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. They're set to go off if you tamper with them," Zoom told them.

"He's bluffing. Let's take them off anyway," Mirror Master said.

"No, really, they will explode," Zoom said face-palming at their stupidity.

"It's me you want. You don't have to kill countless innocents just to get to me," Flash said sacrificially.

"No, but I choose to because I'm an asshole," Zoom reminded him.

"Oh yeah, I remember," Flash said and then moved his arm as quick as he could with the adhesive on it.

"It's no good, Flash. That adhesive will never fully liquefy," Zoom told him.

"That's what I'm counting on," Flash said and threw a bunch of adhesive onto Zoom. "Ha! Now, we're both going to die horribly."

The ceiling window cracked opened revealing Batman. "No one kills anyone…except me," he said darkly.

"We'll have to see about that," Kara said as she landed inside.

A wall was suddenly blasted away as Cyborg entered the museum with his plasma cannon ready. "There was a door," Batman said irritably.

"I just wanted to test out my new tech," Cyborg said.

Green Lantern, Wonder Woman, and Aqua Man all casually walked through the hole. "Since when was a museum robbery of such great importance, it required my services. I have an entire sector to look after," Hal said annoyed.

"Shut up, Hal. You don't actually do any work," Kara said insultingly.

"How dare you say my secret identity out-loud," Hal said outraged.

"Yeah, like that mask really hides your face," Kara said mockingly.

"And your glasses do a better job?" Hal pointed out.

"It's doesn't matter anyway. These clowns will be dead soon," Kara said.

"What?" the Rogues said collectively.

"This is future tech. Even I can't get it off even if I felt like it," Batman examined the bombs.

Wonder Woman put her rope on Zoom's neck. "How do we disarm the charges?" she asked.

"You can't. You're fucked," Zoom replied.

"Just take each one of the rogues as far as you can outside the city," Flash said.

"Well, alright," Hal smirked and activated his ring taking Master Mirror with him. Aqua Man took Top and threw him into the water. "How is this supposed to help?" Top asked frantically.

"It's not," Aqua Man replied.

Top blew up in a huge depth charge explosion that sent water high into the air. "Those poor fish," Aqua Man said sadly.

Wonder Woman took Captain Cold into the forest and then raised her shield. The bomb went off blasting away dozens of acres of forest and creating a wild fire. Wonder Woman's shield was red hot as it shielded her from the blast.

Kara sent Heat Wave high into the atmosphere and then he exploded harmlessly in space. Kara dusted off her hands unaffected by the explosion. "I still get the kill," she grinned.

Green Lantern also did the same allowing Master Mirror to explode in space. As a pre-caution, he put a green bubble around him as he exploded.

Cyborg flew off with Captain Boomerang and worked hard to use his tech to disarm the bomb. He successfully deactivated the bomb and let Boomerang go. "I have successfully disarmed the bomb," he said.

"That's great, Cyborg," Hal said awkwardly.

"Yeah…great," Diana replied.

"Yeah…," Kara replied.

"You guys just let them die didn't you?" Cyborg accused.

"Do you know how many fish died just now," Aqua Man grumbled.

Batman stayed behind with Zoom and Flash in the museum. There was a long awkward silence between them. "So…do you fish?" Batman asked Zoom.

Flash suddenly sent a ball of super-fast air at the charge deactivating it. "Well, that was exciting," Batman said amused.

"We almost died," Flash said.

"Not really. I have an EMP device on my utility belt," Batman revealed.

"What? Why didn't you use it?" Flash asked stupefied.

"The secret to getting a lot of kills…is making other people do it for you," Batman said simply.

Kara dropped in first. "You don't get all those kills just because you're an asshole," she said to Batman.

"Technically, I should get credit for those kills," Zoom piped up.

"Let's see if your head can move faster than the speed of light," Kara said with glowing red eyes.

''You're not going to stop her," Flash realized.

"Nope," Batman replied.

"Let's calm the fuck down, alright," Cyborg said entering the museum.

"Where's Captain Boomerang?" Batman asked.

"I let him go," Cyborg said as if it were nothing.

"Wow, really? Just let super-criminals go?" Batman asked.

"I'm not police, I'm explosive ordinance," Cyborg said defensively. Cyborg used his laser to slice the adhesive off around the Flash and Zoom.

As soon as Zoom was free, Kara quickly broke his legs, so he wouldn't be able to escape. "Oh my God! The brutality," Zoom screamed.

Zoom was then carried out by police who took him to jail.

* * *

 **Justice League Flashpoint Paradox**


	2. Chapter 2

Barry woke up in his chair inside his man cave. The basement was filled with computer monitors, his suit, and random junk. He looked around and noticed his suit was gone. "Barry, for the last time, clean up your room," his mother yelled at him.

Barry gave an odd look as nothing made sense. He casually walked into the kitchen. "Have you seen my Flash suit?" Barry asked.

"What Flash suit?" Nora asked.

"It's red, has a lighting symbol on the front, and Hermes wings where the ears should be," Barry described.

"No, maybe it's in the attic where all your other Halloween costumes are," Nora suggested.

"Right…," Barry said doubtfully.

"Hurry up or you will be late for school," Nora told him.

"Yeah, I don't do school," Barry replied.

"Don't be silly. How are you ever going to graduate high school without going to class?" she asked.

"I can get a GED and my test scores are high enough that colleges don't care about my high school diploma," Barry said.

"Don't be silly, Barry. You're last in your class," Nora said displeased.

"Last in my class? What the fuck?" Barry asked stunned.

"Watch your language, young man," Nora lectured.

"It's just that I don't really fit in with the rest of the kids. I'm different," Barry said.

"You're gay?" Nora wondered.

"No, I'm not gay. Look, I'll just run to school," Barry said and took off.

Barry exited the house with his backpack and prepared to use his super-speed. Failing to get any speed at all, Barry panted and nearly died as he came to the school which was only a few blocks away. Barry was breathing heavily and about to pass out.

"Wait…my mom's alive," Barry finally realized.

* * *

That night Batman easily subdued Harley Quinn inside a skyscraper under construction. Batman then interrogated Quinn for information on the disappearance of Judge Dent. "Where is he?!" Batman shouted menacingly.

"It's on the tip of my tongue," she mocked.

"Let me help you with that," Batman said putting pliers near her mouth.

"It won't do you any good, Bats. He's probably already dead," Quinn said.

"Then so are you," Batman said throwing Quinn off the building.

Cyborg was casually walking around when Harley Quinn hit the ground with a splat. "That poor hooker," Cyborg said to himself.

Cyborg leaped up and met up with Batman. "Do you know how I found you? Guess," Cyborg said proud of himself.

"Thermal vision, cybernetic hearing, and total access to every camera on the grid," Batman listed off.

"Yeah, that's right," Cyborg grinned.

"Nice perk for someone who is in the president's back pocket," Batman remarked.

"It's not like that. He likes my personality," Cyborg said defensively.

"Robo-dick," Batman said.

"Bitch, you just jealous," Cyborg said.

"Is there a reason why you're here?" Batman asked.

"As you know, Aqua Man has declared war on humanity sinking Western Europe into the sea killing one hundred million people. The Amazonians invaded the UK killing thirty-two million people," Cyborg said.

"Sweet. What does this have to do with me?" Batman asked.

"Obviously, their kill count is higher than yours," Cyborg said.

Batman froze at that. "There's no way I can compete with them on numbers alone."

"Think quality over quantity. You have the opportunity to bring down both Aqua Man and Wonder Woman before they destroy this world," Cyborg said persuasively.

Batman grinned. "Alright. I'm in."

* * *

A very confused Barry went to Iris' house. She opened the door for him. "Barry, what's up?" she asked.

"You didn't answer my calls," Barry said frustrated.

"Why would I?" Iris asked.

"Because we're together," Barry assumed.

"Barry, I have a boyfriend and everyone knows you're gay," Iris said.

"I'm not gay. I'm with you," Barry insisted.

"I'm not going to date you just so you can stay in the closet," Iris said and then closed the door.

* * *

Barry decided to get to the bottom of this and drove his motorcycle to the outskirts of Gotham. He found the ruins of Wayne Manor and went inside. He moved the clock aside and went inside the bat cave. There he found nothing out of the ordinary for Batman: C4 explosives, guns, papers disorganized, and lots of booze.

"How did you find this place?" Batman demanded.

"Bruce, it's me, Barry Allen. You recruited me for the Justice League, remember," Barry said as Batman advanced upon him.

"I did?" Batman wondered.

"Yeah," Barry said.

"Hmmm…I figured I would remember something like that," Batman said and then took off his mask revealing….

Bruce Wayne.

* * *

A disheveled man with white hair and a beard ran away from a squad of Amazonian warriors. He shot at them as they chased him. Finally, he was captured in the ruins of London. Wonder Woman approached Steve Trevor and put her rope around his neck.

"Who are you?" Diana demanded.

"Fuck you," Steve replied.

"He's resisting. How is this possible?" an Amazonian warrior asked.

"It's not," Diana replied.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?" Diana demanded.

"Go to hell," he spat.

"Tell me, you savage man. Who are you?" Diana said angrily.

"Alright, my name is Steve Trevor of US Special Forces," Steve relented.

"That wasn't so hard. Now, what is your mission here?" Diana demanded.

"Go…fuck…yourself," Steve replied.

"Really?" Diana asked.

"If you ask the same question three times, it's really annoying," Steve admitted.

"Alright, what is your mission?" Diana said annoyed.

"Fuck off," Steve answered.

Diana rolled her eyes. "What is your mission?"

"Eat shit!"

"Ah, but I have asked you the same question three times. You have to answer now," Diana reminded him.

"Negative, it has to be consecutive. You asked me "really?" which was a question," Steve pointed out.

"For fuck's sake. What is your MISSION?" Diana said furiously.

"Damn, alright, I'm here to retrieve Lois Lane," Steve answered.

"Who is Lois Lane?" Diana asked.

"Bitch, please," Steve answered.

Diana sighed. "Who is Lois Lane? Who is Lois Lane?" she said quickly.

"She's a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist who has been embedded here for months gathering intel for Cyborg," Steve answered. "She's also the hottest woman I have ever met," Steve added.

"Until now," Diana corrected.

"Wait…I thought you all were dudes," Steve said confused.

"What?" Diana asked confused.

"Yeah, no way real women could defeat NATO forces. You all must be dudes with breast implants or something," Steve reasoned.

"I assure you, these are real," Diana said placing Steve in between her breasts.

"Oh God, at least I can die with a raging boner," Steve said.

"Shall I take care of the prisoner for you?" an Amazonian warrior asked.

"No, I shall take care of this sexist pig myself," Diana said. She then floated in the air hanging Steve with her rope until he was dead.

"Find me this Lois Lane," Diana ordered.

* * *

Bruce and Barry clinked shot glasses as they told each other stories about their different time universes. "So, where's your suit?" Bruce asked.

"I put it in my ring. Just a sec," Barry said and then activated his ring. Instead of his red suit, there was instead a Reverse-Flash suit.

"That's not my suit," Barry said stunned.

"I would hope not. It looks hideous," Bruce commented.

"It's Zoom's suit. He must have caused this. You see, he's from the future. So, he must have changed the past," Barry said.

"Yeah, sure," Bruce allowed and downed a shot.

"Everything has changed. "My mom's alive, Diana and Arthur are waging war against each other, and everyone thinks I'm gay," Barry said.

Bruce chuckled at that. "Why give me this suit though?" Barry wondered.

"It's the same reason why I leave Batarangs around. It's to convey a message," Bruce said.

"What message is that?" Barry asked.

"It's a mystery we're going to solve," Bruce smiled.


	3. Chapter 3

Deathstroke looked over Lex Luthor's shoulders while he worked on a computer. "I thought you were smart," Deathstroke commented.

"I am smart," Lex replied.

"Then why are we doing this on the sea instead of in the air. The sea is Aqua Man's home turf, you idiot," Deathstroke grumbled.

"If you thought it was a bad plan, you should have said something. Now, it's too late," Lex said.

"I just wanted a beautiful death," Deathstroke replied.

Lex simply stared at Deathstroke. "I'm looking for a power source that allowed Aqua Man to send a tsunami wave against Europe. Something that powerful would require a large power source," Lex said.

"Oh really?" Deathstroke mocked.

The ship was suddenly hit by an enormous wave. "And so it begins," Deathstroke put his mask on.

Aqua Man's troops leaped from the sea onto the destroyer. A large battleship dwarfing the destroyer came out of the sea. The men on the destroyer were quickly overwhelmed by Aqua Man's men. Deathstroke fought like a badass but was eventually defeated. Lex Luthor was captured.

Aqua Man personally came out with his trident. "At least I was right," Lex smirked and activated his watch.

"No survivors," Aqua Man said and then sliced through Lex.

* * *

Barry was on the roof of Wayne Manor in an electric chair waiting for a lightning strike to hit him. "This is the most retarded thing I have ever seen," Batman said.

"Strap me in. I have to recreate the same conditions that caused the accident that gave me my powers," Barry insisted.

"You know why they call it an accident? Because it only happens once," Batman said.

"Whatever, why do you have an electric chair anyway?" Barry asked.

"I collect execution devices. Don't judge me," Batman said.

The two stayed outside for a few hours waiting for a lightning strike. "This is getting kind of boring," Batman said.

"It'll happen. It has to," Barry said.

Batman decided to go inside and watch TV. A lightning strike finally hit Barry electrifying him. Soon thereafter, he was on fire. "Oh God! Help me!" Barry shouted.

Batman continued to channel surf oblivious to Barry's screaming. He finally went outside and saw Barry on fire. "Holy shit!" he said and covered Barry up with his cape. Barry was now an electrified burned up mess of a boy.

"I better get the shovel," Batman muttered.

* * *

Cyborg sat in a metallic chair as his energy cells were replaced. A video input from the president appeared to him. "So, you're relieved of duty," the president said flatly.

"Why?" Cyborg demanded.

"Basically, without Batman, you have no team," the president said simply.

"He isn't that important," Cyborg grumbled.

"We're going to send in the real heroes to solve this crisis," the president said.

"Real heroes? You mean the military? I thought I was a part of the military. Is this because I'm Black?" Cyborg demanded.

"What? I'm Black as well, fool," the president said and signed off.

"Damn," Cyborg muttered and wondered what to do.

* * *

Barry woke up in extreme pain. He had third-degree burns all over his body, and he was wrapped up. "No!" he screamed as he realized he had failed to achieve super-speed.

"Finally, you're awake," Batman muttered bored.

"I had the weirdest dream. I dreamed that Aqua Man and Wonder Woman fucked!" Barry said.

"Sounds like a good dream," Batman said enviously.

"I remember things that have happened in this timeline but also my own. I remember an Aqua Man that would never harm a human being, a Wonder Woman who wasn't a whore, and…," he trailed off.

"A version of you that isn't gay," Batman added.

"I'm not gay!" Barry shouted and then felt pain all over his body from the outburst.

"Easy there," Batman said condescendingly.

"We have to try again," Barry said determinedly.

"Let's do it," Batman grinned.

* * *

Aqua Man sat on his throne inside a giant submarine. His general approached wearing a golden mask. "The fleet has arrived, my liege. However, the English coastline has an energy shield that is strong enough to deflect all bombardment."

"The Amazonians are alerted to our presence," Aqua Man said disappointed.

"The Admiral was surprised…," the general attempted to excuse.

"He is as clumsy as he is stupid. Prepare your men for a surface attack," Aqua Man ordered.

The general bowed out and the admiral approached. "We have just arrived and..," the Admiral began and was impaled by Aqua Man's trident.

"You have failed me for the last time, Admiral," Aqua Man said displeased. He then turned to Black Manta. "You are in command now, Admiral," Aqua Man pointed to him.

"Thank you, my liege," Black Manta said in a robotic voice.

* * *

Batman prepared the electric chair again but had reservations. "As amusing as it is to see you on fire again, what makes you think this is going to work?"

"I have to try," Barry said determinedly. "How about dousing out the flames faster next time?" he said irritably.

"Maybe," Batman said promising nothing.

Lightning struck again zapping Barry. The surge shook the mansion causing electrical cables to come undone. At first, Batman was too busy drinking from his flask to notice. As Barry continued to sizzle, he rushed over to the disconnected cables and connected them. In so doing, Batman got the shock of his life and fell off the balcony.

Barry felt his powers returning and his body healing. Noticing Batman had fallen over, he raced through the house to catch him below. "I told you I was fast," Barry said as he arrived.

"Right," Batman grumbled standing on the ground unharmed.

"How?" Barry wondered.

"I'm Batman."

* * *

Barry and Batman met up back in the Batcave. "I'm not about to give you one of my own," Batman said giving Barry the reverse Flash uniform.

Barry sighed and put it on. He then vibrated very quickly and his uniform became that of the Flash with red coloring. "Did you just speed-force your way to a tailor and come back?" Batman questioned.

"Maybe I did," Flash replied.

"Hmmm," Batman muttered and took another drink. "I suggest you take it for a test run and see if you can break the time barrier."

"Maybe, I will," Flash said passive-aggressively and took off.

Flash ran as quickly as he could in the desert wastelands, but he couldn't get fast enough to break the time barrier. He just wasn't healed enough. He stumbled, fell, and tumbled all over the place.

* * *

Barry came back to Wayne Manor frustrated by his failure. "There must be another one out there using the speed-force. It's keeping me from getting enough energy to break the time barrier," Flash said.

"Or, you just suck," Batman countered.

"No, it has to be Zoom," Flash said confidently. "He wants to keep me from changing things back."

"So, nothing can be done," Batman concluded and took another drink.

"Maybe, if we got some help. Supergirl could help me locate Zoom," Flash said.

"I told you. There's no one that fits that description," Batman said annoyed.

"Thirty years ago, there was a meteor strike that wiped out Metropolis," Flash said working on Batman's computer.

"So?" Batman asked unconcernedly.

"It's the same exact time period when Supergirl arrived in Kansas in my world," Flash recalled.


	4. Chapter 4

Flash and Batman looked over a very large crater where downtown Metropolis should have been. "Really? Of all the places on the globe, her ship happens to crash in the middle of the biggest city in the country," Flash commented.

"Almost as if she targeted it," Batman said suspiciously. "What makes you think she survived?"

"She's a tough cookie," Flash said.

"I bet I could kick her ass," Batman said confidently.

"Actually, you do," Flash agreed.

"Nice," Batman grinned.

"So, where's your contact?" Flash asked.

"Don't worry. He's always on time," Batman said.

Cyborg landed and towered over both of them. "I didn't think I would get your call," Cyborg said to Batman.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures," Batman said.

"Who are you?" Cyborg asked Flash.

"I'm Barry Allen. They call me the Flash because I'm really fast," Flash said.

"Well, so you know, I'm a badass," Cyborg smiled.

"We need to find the alien that crash-landed here," Flash said.

"It's classified," Cyborg said flatly.

"So, hack into their systems," Batman said obviously.

"Fine, whatever," Cyborg muttered. "Alright, I know the way. Follow me."

Cyborg, Batman, and the Flash walked through the sewer system under Metropolis. "Is this really necessary to walk in the sewers," Flash complained.

"I can turn my sense of smell off. It must suck to be you," Cyborg remarked.

"Let's just get there," Batman said frustrated.

Cyborg found a secret entrance that led them to an underground bunker facility. Cyborg attached his wiring to the security cameras to give them an endless loop. "There is a skeleton crew here," Cyborg said.

"Do your thing," Batman said.

Flash immediately went to work knocking all the guards out with his super-speed. Cyborg then activated the computer system allowing them inside a large vault. Inside was a mad scientist lab of weird specimens. Going further inside, they unlocked another set of doors. Finally, they came upon a room lit with red light. In the corner of the room was a naked blond female.

"Why are you naked? Don't they give you clothes?" Flash asked.

Kara stood up and eyed the three men. "Yeah, but after a while, I stopped giving a fuck. You should see the face on the guards when they come in here."

"Okay…well, I suggest you put some clothes on because we're leaving," Cyborg said awkwardly.

"Are you getting video of this," Batman whispered.

"Of course I am, fool," Cyborg whispered back.

"I heard that," Kara said getting into her outfit.

"So, why do I want to leave and visit the scary outside world?" Kara asked.

"You like being a prisoner?" Flash asked.

"I get three meals a day and a place to stay. I am so grateful to the government. You should all love the government, too," Kara said enthusiastically.

"Well, we're from the government, so you can trust us," Cyborg said.

"Yeah, from the government," Batman muttered sarcastically.

"Really? I'll do whatever you say," Kara said brightly.

Flash, Cyborg, and Batman got Kara up to speed on everything that had happened to the Earth since she crash-landed. "Wow, that's really fucked up," she giggled after she was told everything.

"You going to help us?" Flash asked helpfully.

"Look, I'm not really interested in your political bullshit, alright. But there was this one man that visited me a lot a few years back. His name was Jimmy. If you can help me save Jimmy, I'll do whatever it takes," Kara said.

"Who the fuck is Jimmy?" Batman wondered.

Flash gave him the "silent" motion. "Sure, we'll help you save Jimmy," Batman agreed.

The four exited the sewers and found themselves surrounded by patrol boats. "Cyborg, you have exceeded your authority…," they said over a loudspeaker.

"Come on, man," Cyborg said showing his hands.

"Look, he's armed and resisting arrest," the commander said.

"Oh, that is bullshit," Cyborg said and was suddenly shot to the head. The patrol boats fired on all of them with machine guns.

Flash went to work avoiding the gun fire and disabling each of their guns. A soldier with an RPG fired from behind their position. Kara blocked the rocket with her hand and was unaffected by the explosion. She floated up into the air and fired heat vision at all the soldiers and patrol boats killing them all.

Kara landed back to the ground. "Wow, that was so much fun. Let's do more of that."

"The government wants you to go to England and kill Mermen and Amazonians," Batman told her.

"For Christ's sake," Cyborg muttered.

"Let's go," Kara said cheerfully.

Hal Jordan was having the time of his life flying an alien spaceship. He was flying low to the ocean's surface to avoid radar detection. "You're one thousand meters from the drop zone. On behalf of all humanity…," the General began.

"General, shut your mouth," Hal said playfully.

Hal came upon the Merman ships that were underwater. His ship dived downwards towards the water. "Peace!"

A sea monster then came out of the water and swallowed Hal's ship. "Really?" Hal said as his ship exploded.

A nuclear explosion blasted the sea monster apart but the Merman ships below were unaffected.

Aqua Man sensed the death of his beloved sea monster and the explosion. "God damn!" he said as the ship shook. "Continue invasion preparations," he ordered his men.

Batman, Cyborg, Flash, and Supergirl came upon an ordinary house in the suburbs. "Listen up, guys. I have a news flash," Cyborg said creating a hologram of what had just happened.

"Hal Jordan is dead," Flash said stunned upon seeing the update.

"Yeah, who knew a biological organism could absorb an entire nuclear blast," Cyborg said.

"Almost sounds silly," Batman remarked. "By the way, why are we here?"

"We're Shazaam," the kids all said together.

"Neat," Batman replied sarcastically.

"Oh, you kids look so cute. Pity most of you will probably die in the battle," Kara said pinching the cheek of one of the kids.

"Putting kids in danger. Isn't that a bit cruel?" Flash wondered.

"We need all the help we can get to defeat the Amazonians and the Mermen," Cyborg argued.

"Agreed," Batman said.

"Wait, I thought you were against the whole idea of dead orphans," Flash said confused.

"No, I'm against orphans with dead parents. I risk the lives of orphans every other day," Batman corrected.

"Let's go," the Shazaam kids said enthusiastically.

"My God, I'm going to hell for this," Flash muttered. He turned to Batman. "Can the Batplane fit all of us?"

"Maybe," Batman replied and took another drink.

The Batwing went super-sonic towards London. In the backseat were Cyborg, Flash, Supergirl, and the kids all squished together in one seat. "God damn!" Flash expressed as no one could move a muscle.

"Quit your bitching," Batman said as he took another drink.

A water beam from the surface blasted the Batwing sending it into a spin. All occupants fell out of their seats and began tumbling. "Prepare for ejection," Batman said to them all.

"What?" Flash said as she was sent up into the air.

Batman parachuted down into London and looked around. The kids had come together in the form of Shazaam, Cyborg used his rocket engines to settle, and Flash used his super-speed to create enough lift, so he could drop down safely. The group came together in a broken building and watched the Amazonians and Mermen fight it out.

"If we take down their leaders, we can end this war," Batman said studying the battlefield.

"So, we capture Aqua Man and Wonder Woman then," Flash said determinedly.

"Yeah, if you want to end the war," Batman said.

"Wait, what?" Flash asked confused.

"This war is awesome! You want to make a bet on who's going to win?" Kara asked Batman.

"You don't have any money," Batman reminded her.

"Please, I can rob a bank easily," Kara said.

"Are you listening to yourselves? We didn't come all this way to just watch the war happen. We came to end it," Cyborg said.

Batman and Kara rolled their eyes. "Fine, be that way," Cyborg said walking off. Flash and Shazaam followed entering the fray.

"I might as well get in my kicks. Not like I can end this war by myself," Batman said.

"Stay alive for ten minutes, and I'll end it myself," Kara promised.

"Deal," Batman said and took off.

Aqua Man and Wonder Woman fought in a furious duel. It was suddenly interrupted by Flash, Cyborg, Batman, and Shazaam. Flash, Cyborg, and Batman attempted to subdue Aqua Man with difficulty. Batman got thrown out of the building and was targeted by Black Manta. Shazaam fought Wonder Woman in the air throwing buildings at each other.

Batman finally threw a grenade at Black Manta disabling him and cracking open his mask revealing a Black man. "Oh my God, you were a black guy this whole time," Batman said amused.

"Damn you, Batman," Black Manta said and then passed.

Mermen came upon their position and fired on Batman forcing his retreat. Flash entered the scene and rescued Batman before he could be shot up. "You okay?" Flash asked him.

"It's nothing," Batman told him. "Find the speedster. Make this right."

"No. I won't do nothing as people die," Flash said dramatically. He turned around and saw the Batman was already gone.

"Hello, Barry," Zoom said while stirring his tea.

"This is all your fault!" Flash accused.

"Wait, what?" Zoom said surprised.

The two sped around the broken city at super-human speed. Zoom got the better of Flash and stabbed him in the leg with a piece of rebar. "What did you do to the world?" Flash demanded of Zoom as people died all around them.

"I didn't do any of this. You did," Zoom revealed. "Think, Barry. What did you do? What little good deed did you do?"

"I saved someone," Flash recalled.

"Yeah," Zoom grinned.

"I saved my mother," Flash realized.

"That's right," Zoom agreed.

"No, that's bullshit. Saving one person wouldn't have done all this," Flash rejected.

"Yeah, you're right. I was just fucking with you, Barry. The real reason the world has gone to shit is someone decided to give an anonymous tip to the Mer-Queen that Aqua Man was having an affair with Wonder Woman," Zoom smirked.

"What? You bastard!" Flash shouted.

"One other thing: you being gay has nothing to do with whether your mom was murdered," Zoom said.

"I'm not gay!" Flash repeated.

Aqua Man engaged Cyborg in a fierce battle. Using his trident, Aqua Man punctured and disabled Cyborg's main arm cannon. Aqua Man then got on top of Cyborg and ripped open his chassis. Aqua Man ripped off another robotic arm and could see Cyborg's heart amidst the machinery.

Wonder Woman got the better of Shazaam and put her lasso around his neck. "This form is not your own. Tell me how to break the enchantment," she ordered.

"With a word," Shazaam replied.

"What word?" Wonder Woman demanded.

"Bitch," Shazaam replied.

"Really?" Wonder Woman frowned impatiently.

"Okay, its Shazaam!" he relented and with a strike of lightning becoming six kids again.

Wonder Woman then took her sword and stabbed through each of the kids. "Damn, she went full Anakin Skywalker on those kids," Kara said on a ledge watching the fight.

Aqua Man took his trident to slice through Cyborg's heart. Suddenly, a laser beam sliced his arm off. Aqua Man cried out in pain as Kara landed next to them. "Too easy," she smirked. She blasted Aqua Man with frost breath sending him into a building.

Cyborg then powered down as his organs failed. "Oh, I got here too late, didn't I? My bad…my bad," she said embarrassed.

"Well, time to open a can of whoop-ass on both sides," Kara grinned.

Kara floated high in the air and looked down on both armies. She fired heat vision on them blasting many of them to bits. The two armies were too distracted with each other to coordinate a counter-attack against Kara. She fried each one individually with heat vision while using frost breath on them collectively.

Kara then landed in front of Aqua Man. "They say catch-and-release is inhumane to fish. I better put you out of your misery."

"This isn't your fight, Kryptonian," Aqua Man said to her.

"But it is. My ancient ancestors came to this world 20,000 years ago. They settled here but then they became divided. Some went into the sea while others stayed on land. You and the Amazonians are related through us," Kara revealed.

"No, it can't be true. I have nothing in common with them," Aqua Man said defiantly.

"Search your feelings; you know it to be true. You both have long life spans, incredible strength, and powers beyond imagination. Did you think it just came to you naturally?" Kara said.

"No!" Aqua Man cried out realizing it was true.

"I am pure Kryptonian while you two have deluded bloodlines. You're no match for me. You never were," Kara said.

Diana then appeared with a sword ready. "Arthur, you have been defeated by the sister-hood."

"Yeah, I'm not into that feminist bullshit," Kara corrected.

"What?" Diana asked stunned.

"Look, none of this would have happened if you weren't a cheating bastard," Kara pointed at Aqua Man. "If you hadn't worn Queen Mera's helmet like a trophy, which by-the-way is very insensitive and distasteful," Kara said to Diana. "And if you two could have decided on a trial to determine the facts of the case."

"That sounds reasonable in hindsight," Diana admitted.

"And they call me the psychotic one. Alright, let's get this show on the road. Your sword, Diana," Kara said.

"What? No," she said defiantly.

Kara sped towards Diana, lifted her off the ground, and broke her neck. "I wasn't asking," Kara said as she took her sword.

Kara then walked towards Aqua Man with the sword in hand. Aqua Man pressed a button symbol on his belt. "Is that a call for more reinforcements?" Kara smirked.

"No, a doomsday weapon that will destroy the surface of this planet," Aqua Man said insanely.

"Rage quitting, I see," Kara realized.

Kara sliced through Aqua Man's heart killing him instantly.

On the Mermen battleship, the doomsday weapon initiated. Using the power of a Green Lantern battery, the ship disappeared in a brilliant flash of green light. The light expanded towards London and eventually the entire surface of the planet.

"Good thing I can breathe in space," Kara said amused.

Zoom and Flash saw their impending doom approach. "You'll die too," Flash said to Zoom.

"Totally worth it," Zoom replied. "As long as I can siphon off enough speed-force, you won't be able to reach the time barrier."

A bullet suddenly went through Zoom's head. Batman nonchalantly walked up to Flash as Zoom fell. "Wow, you actually killed him," Flash said amazed.

"Why? Does Batman not kill in your world?" Batman asked.

"Oh, well…," Flash tried to recall.

"You better get moving," Batman said and then handed him a letter.

Flash took the letter and attempted to run on his injured leg. The green light was on the verge of overtaking him. Flash sped up escaping the city and then entering the speed force. There he saw another version of himself attempting to break the time barrier.

Flash met up with his other self and handed him the letter. "What the fuck?" the other Flash wondered taking the letter.

Barry woke up in his office with a newspaper detailing the stock market plunge. "Damn, my stocks," he grumbled. He then realized what had happened and raced out of the forensics office. He went straight home and found his mother alive and well.

"You're alive, mom," Barry said happily.

"Of course, I am," his mother smiled.

"I have to go, mom. I have just one last thing to do," Barry said and exited the house.

Back at the museum, the Rogues had been captured along with Zoom. Supergirl had a good grip on Zoom as he was about to be sent to a special prison. Barry showed up as Flash just as Zoom was to be taken away. "Nice to show up to the burglary of your own museum," Kara said sarcastically.

"Kara, I need you to do one thing for me. Kill him," Flash said.

"What the…," Zoom wondered.

Kara quickly broke his neck. "Mind explaining why I had to do that?" Kara asked.

There was an awkward pause. "No."

"Whatever," Kara said and flew off.

Flash entered the Batcave to tell Batman his story. "So, Batman from the other time dimension sent me a letter that if I wanted to save my mom and keep the world from apocalypse, I needed to have Zoom killed," Flash said.

"Cool story, bro," Batman said disinterestedly.

"I was able to change the timeline and save my mom with no consequences. Isn't that great?" Flash asked him.

"Did it change the fact that you're gay?" Batman asked.

"Wait, what? No!" Flash cried out.

End


End file.
